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Honestly, mother

30 Dec

I was dancing to my iPod while reading the newspaper in the kitchen. Mama, who was sweeping at the time, stopped in her tracks, took one look at me and said, “Mukha kang pusang ‘di ma-tae.”

HAHAHAHAHA

😐

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When things get out of hand

17 Oct

Final school works for the sem now in progress.

Play with bubbles to ease stress.

Bottle slips from fingers.

Bubble soap spills on [mother’s] laptop keyboard.

Tissues for an attempted rescue.

Screen turns fuzzy.

 

asldksfkljkjhfiooqw1pp’l;;Stress returns tenfold

Of children and the darndest things they say

9 May

Today, I taught my younger cousins AJ (15), Erika (12) and Bea (8) the concepts of biological sex, sexual orientation and gender expression and the misconceptions surrounding them. (Because I try to be a responsible ate like that.) This involved telling them about LGBTs and what the acronym stood for.

Me: Ang problema kasi sa Tagalog, eni-eni lang ang paggamit natin sa mga salitang bakla at bading. Samantalang sa English, may iba-ibang termino para diyan. Ang taong pinanganak na lalaki na hitsurang lalaki at may gusto sa ibang lalaki, ang tawag dun —

Cousins: Gay.

Me:  Tama! Tapos, ang taong pinanganak na lalaki na hitsurang babae at may gusto sa lalaki, ang tawag dun, transgender o transsexual.

Bea: Ah. Eh ‘di ang tawag  po diyan, ate, transport gender?

Me: *tumbling*

_________________

Me: O, pag nag-birthday ako ngayong taon, lahat tayo kailangan naka-dress!

Bea: Yay! Ate, turuan mo naman kami kung paano magpapayat.

Me: Alam mo , kailangan kumain ka nang mga nutritious na, nakakabusog pa.

AJ: Oo nga. Paano ka naman papayat kung puro taba tsaka balat yung kinakain mo?

Me: Matuto ka kasi kumain ng gulay.

Bea: Kumakain naman ako ng gulay eh! Kumakain nga ako ng kangkong.

AJ: Ilang kangkong?

Bea: Minsan, kumakain akong dalawang piraso.

AJ: Tapos sasabayan mo ng balat ng fried chicken tsaka dalawang kanin? Iba ka din eh.

__________________

Bea to our cousin Ian (14): Ang dami mo nang atraso sakin, pangit ka!

__________________

Auntie B: Alam mo, Bea, lahi tayo ng mga magaganda.

Bea: Eh bakit si Auntie S?

Mama: Bey, bakit mo naman inaaway si Auntie S, siya na nga lang kakampi mo eh!

Auntie S: Minsan nga tinanong ko sa bunso ko kung maganda ako. Sabi niya sakin, “Oo, Mama, maganda. Maganda ang iyong kalooban!”

Srsly, Mother

20 Apr

Mama: It’s so disappointing! I tried on five swimsuits today and none of them fit. Ang bagay lang talaga sakin, two-piece.

Me: Ahahahaha… 😐

The day in phrases

19 Apr

One day.

Three cities.

Five shopping centers.

Three mochi balls and organic (read: I-paid-too-much-for-something-that-tastes-like-oreo) cookies for lunch.

Window shopping for work.

Checking out products that cost an arm and a legwork, trying to look unfazed.

Reaffirming the truth upon which the relationship between girls and malls is founded: shopping = serious business.

Nostalgic stories of old Manila by the friendly company driver Manong Jose.

Leaving my bag in a native crafts store and coming back for it before any one noticed (yay for prints that blend in the background).

Realizing that revolving doors and a high-income clientele do not an exciting mall make.

Bringing home pasalubong for a change (Reese’s peanut butter cups, my favorite and mother’s too!).

Discovering a pastry stall that sells chocolate-coated cheesecake bars.

Waiting in traffic, thinking of nothing and of everything.

Gusto daw ni Mama magka-facebook account ngayong Pasko.

19 Dec

Eh kung yun na lang kaya i-regalo ko sa kanya? HAHA.